Labels are indeed complex things. We use them to relate to others and to also differentiate ourselves. And I guess we sort of use them on others as a form of social control as well.

I’ve been thinking quite a bit about this (ever since I discovered the fake geek girl meme). I think part of it comes down to the fact that we quite like to label ourselves (and everything else, really; humans, we sure like our categories and labels…), as a way of constructing or defining our identity. So I can go around saying ‘I’m a gamer’, or ‘I’m a science nerd’ and be reassured that I know something about myself; and something that can be conveyed easily to other people, at that.

Problem is, some of these labels we like to use are a bit ambiguous. There is no magical check list of twenty games you have to have played to consider yourself a gamer (as you touched on in your gamer identity posts, I think); and you’re always going to meet that person who is more skilled at gaming, or who has played more games than you.

So how can we be sure that we are who we think we are? How do we prove to the world and to ourselves that we have earned that ‘gamer’ tag that we tack after our name?

We mock people who we deem have definitely not earned that tag, of course. We point out that we are nothing like -that- fake gamer over there, who has never heard of a BioWare game before. (Or alternatively, who only ever plays WoW and BioWare games – kind of like me, heh). And by denying them that aspect of their identity, we show that we’re fundamentally different, and reinforce it in ourselves.

So, yeah…

/2cents

The thought I carried home after reading the post the first time was that he was criticizing the oversexualization of women in conventions. While I’m tired of sex everywhere too, I have two problems with that:

1- If you’re going to ban sexy costume, you might as well ban showing off fancy cameras, fancy phones and fancy cars since they’re also signs of attention seeking behaviour.
2- While sex is used as a cheap, easy way to attract attention or to sell products, it would stop working if people stopped buying into it.

1- The belief that popularity with gaming men is something worth acquiring – while I find gaming very sexy, I don’t think my non-gaming girlfriends share that taste since they constantly complain about their men and their gaming.
2- Or the belief that gamers are an easy audience, and if one fails at attracting attention elsewhere, they throw some bait out to the geeky crowd who will chomp it down. Belief that is insulting to everyone involved, but I won’t deny that attention-seeking behaviour happens in gamer circles (whether this behaviour is produced by real gamers or “fake” gamers, I can’t say). However, if idiots stopped reinforcing attention-seeking behaviour, it would stop happening!

I can understand that in a way, because I know men who have this fantasy about dating a girl who also turns out to be good at playing ‘their games’. So by pretending to be a gamer it will increase your popularity with men in general, right?

On the other hand, this also fulfills a stereotypical male belief that women cannot do ‘guy stuff’; women should not talk about or play sports because everyone knows they are no good at it compared to men. Women shouldn’t play computer games that men like because everyone knows only men can be good at them. Calling out women like this is a way of ‘proving’ we are all fake gamers in reality.

I’m hoping this comment gets through the spam filter, unfortunately I’m not as eloquent as John Scalzi or you and I feel there is nothing I can add to what he and you said.